Monthly Archives: November 2010

going somewhere


I experienced a strange sensation tonight, probably enhanced by the seven grueling hours I spent in class today. As I sat on the wooden bench of a bus stop, surrounded by the hubbub of the city, a bus (not mine) pulled up to the bus stop. A few people stepped off the bus; a few people embarked. La-dee-da. An Asian man got on the bus and started walking toward the rear seats. As he was walking, the bus slowly began to leave the bus stop. These simultaneous actions caused an almost-dizzying effect for me: as this man walked backward, and the bus slowly pulled forward, the man stayed directly in front of me, almost as though the two of us were the only stationary forces present.

Now if this were high school physics, I’d ask you to figure out the velocity of the bus based on the speed of the man walking and his distance from me and whatever other detail you’d need to solve the question. But I was terrible at high school physics and I’m not mean like that. No, what I took away from that brief moment was this: while the man was walking toward the back of the bus, he was actually staying in the same spot on the pavement. He was moving, and he wasn’t moving.

I totally feel like that sometimes. Sure, I’m moving to the back of the bus. I’m almost 25 percent finished with my master’s degree. I’m another week closer to finishing up my time at work. Another day closer to being able to legitimately listen to Christmas music. But I occasionally experience an eerie feeling of not really moving at all. Time keeps moving forward, waiting for no man (or woman). But am I growing? Am I becoming? I want to learn to be with God and grow in Him, but instead I often feel like I close my eyes for a second, only to find that a week has flown by, like all that traffic flying by a downtown bus with an Asian man inside.

Light bulb moment! Maybe the first step to moving and growing in life is to STOP.

Or maybe that’s my subconscious’s cheesy way of telling me that I woke up at 5:30 am and need to go to bed. Happy Monday, everyone. Don’t waste this week!